Tuesday, May 08, 2007

everlasting?

There she stood by the window, waiting for his arrival. She has been feeling really low lately, thinking a lot about her relationship. Everything seemed so faint...she couldn't remember the last time she cuddled in his arms. Sudden glimpse on her past, when "love was in the air", all the cuddling that kept her warm, all the kisses that brought smiles on her face, all the support she got from him, physically and mentally. She missed all those. But she stayed strong. She stood by the window, looking out, finding for her man. She seemed anxious, she looked high and low, he wasn't there. Her face showed disappointment. She was determined that her love will come, will come to her. She went to the kitchen, grabbed a cup of coffee, sat comfortably in her velvet sofa. As she sipped her coffee, she was smiling. They were walking along the streets of Kuala Lumpur. It was a night of sharing. They talked, discussed, and discovered each other inside out. From the bad habits, to the likes and dislikes. They walked and talked. It was the time she enjoyed most, and that was when she realised how special he is, and how much she'd love to lean over his arms. She wanted a man, a man who could stand by her, a man who trusted her, and knew what she wanted. She never loved him for his money. nor his job, not even for gifts, chocolates, flowers, etc. All she wanted was a person to stand by her back, to celebrate when she's happy and to have her back when she falls. That was the day she decided, that he would be her man. That was their first date together. "Knock" "Knock", it was the door. she rushed and opened it, praying hard it was him. As soon as she saw him, she smiled, welcoming him into the house. he never bothered looking at her face, she was sad, but she made herself understand, that he was tired, and that he needed a break. She kept her smile, taking his coat, serving him a glass of water to quench is thirst. She made him dinner, but he declined. She tried being a little forceful about having dinner, he snapped and left the room. She was dissappointed once again, but she kept on smiling. As he was about to hit the bed, she approached him, asking him how was work and all, hoping to get a little attention that she's been waiting for ever since the day started. All he did was nod his head, and asked her to leave him, he wanted to sleep. She gave him another smile, tucked him to bed, and wished him good night. She left the room, and started tearing. It was their aniversary. She went to the kitchen, blew out the candles she used to decorate the kitchen, hoping to create a romantic environment, and she started throwing away all the food she had been preparing the night before. As she pushed the food prepared into the rubish bin, she remembered, she has been going through the same pain for the past 5 years, and they have been together for 6 yrs. All she could do is cry, and look at herself. She always blamed herself, she always told herself, dat the man she loves deserves someone much better than her, and she sumtimes feel so disgusted with herself. She cleared the dining table, and decided to hit the bed. She entered the room once again, there he was, the man she loves, lying on the bed, fast asleep. she washed her legs, and lied beside him. She whispered to his ears, "Happy Aniversary". She also whispered how much she loves him, and that she feels sad that he has lost all the interest he once had for her. Then she turned the other side, and closed her eyes.

The next morning, he found her lifeless on bed. She died.


Question: Is it love or lust?

Question: Is love actually everlasting?

Question: Why do we always blame ourselves?

Questions: Is this the meaning of life?

Just questions, without answers......

Believe in yourself, and love yourself, there is no one who can love u as much as u love yourself.

2 comments:

  1. Anonymous1:19 AM

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  2. sharu1:20 AM

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